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:icondeer-princess: More from deer-princess


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September 4, 2012
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She looked around. None friendly faces. Who wanted to befriend the girl that only knew how to talk online? Who wanted to befriend the girl who built herself a castle of fairytales of stories to block the real world out? Befriend the girl who hated her "Friends" enough to create new ones, some sweet, some freaky, all imaginary? The answer: No one. No one wanted to help the girl escape from her pretty little prison. Some had tried, but failed. Everyone else would see her castle as some kind of evil trap, while she saw it as a golden castle that could fly in the sky, surrounded with magic clouds and dragons. In her pretty little castle, she would be surrounded with personified countries, half-demons, fairies and voices that had no face. Voices that came from no mouth within her reach. Voices that could disappear out sight without her being able to do a thing. To her it was such a beautiful, big, amazing castle. To family, friends, or generally anyone around, it was a big, scary and black manor, infested with vampires and monsters that stole her future away, without her fighting back. To them, it was like an enemy base, where she was happily trapped, shackled to a train that lead to a horrible future, without her caring where the next stop happened to be. She knew it well, that her beautiful castle was flying towards an awful future for her, but the castle was too important for her to abandon. The castle was more important than the people trying to pull her out of it, and she knew it. If someone felt like the supposedly black castle should be shot down from the sky, blown to pieces, or thrown out of her reach, she would care less and less about them. She knew her pretty castle was once going to turn as black as the others saw it, but she didn't care. She craves for the mouthless voices, the golden dragons, her kind and inhuman friends. She craves for the things she cannot touch, see, hear or smell, craves for all that is unreal and too perfect for the hell she lives in. Knowing this, she's closing the gate of her fairytale. No one will pull her out from diamond butterflies, blue roses or talking trees. She can see the grey butterflies of the real world and future, lose their wings. The pretty diamonds are stealing her future, eating the grey, and she knows it well. But why should she follow the grey butterflies? Why should she follow them to a grey world, with grey people and a dark sky, when she could watch the beautiful diamonds eat the grey and boring away, only at the cost of her future? When she came home, she felt her castle crash, as her mom told her to get away from her computer in less than five seconds. "Without the PC, my castle will stay old and get grey!" she said, describing the PC as the caravan carrying new friends and mouthless voices to her flying castle. Looking away from her mom, she googled for a list of mental disabilities to see to see if she had one. "Mom. I think I may have ASPD." She said, as she found a link leading to a description of the disorder called AntiSocial Personality Disorder. "Please, don't even think of things like that! We're getting very worried for you!" her grey and boring mom said. She didn't really notice. She was busy flying off to her wonderful castle, with the caravan that held two demons. Even so, her castle was getting darker. She had confused herself, what was real and what was not. Was her beautiful friends just evil lies? Was the magical world she loved so much, only a puppet show of her imagination? Would she really have to leave the golden castle one more time? Would leaving the grey world for good take her to her flying castle? She didn't know anything anymore.. All her faced friends from the golden castle were crying, as she fell out from the caravan, losing herself between the two worlds, unable to control emotions and actions. There was nothing she could do anymore. She couldn't like the grey world anymore, but she couldn't properly reach her magic castle anymore either.. Stuck between the worlds, all she can do is cry and hope she'll come back to her black castle once. It may have been a one-way ticket to hell, but it was better than the boring gray-scale of place the real world was. Or so she though..
And...
I guess that she's just another me.
Not really much to say.. Wrote this while listening to Brick By Boring Brick, by Paramore.


~*~ Lyrics time ~*~

She lives in a fairy tale,
Somewhere too far for us to find!
Forgotten the taste and smell
Of a world that she's left behind!

It's all about the exposure the lens I told her!
The angles were all wrong now,
She's ripping wings off of butterflies.

keep your feet on the ground,
when your head's in the clouds!
Well go get your shovel,
And we'll dig a deep hole!

To bury the castle, bury the castle!
Well go get your shovel,
And we'll dig a deep hole!

To bury the castle, bury the castle!

So one day he found her crying,
Coiled up on the dirty ground!
Her prince finally came to save her
And the rest you can figure out.

But it was a trick,
And the clock struck twelve!
Well make sure to build your home brick by boring brick
or the wolf's gonna blow it down!

keep your feet on the ground,
when your head's in the clouds!
Well go get your shovel,
And we'll dig a deep hole!
To bury the castle, bury the castle!

Well you built up a world of magic!
Because your real life is tragic!
Yeah you built up a world of magic!

If it's not real,
You can't hold it in your hand,
You can't feel it with your heart,
And I won't believe it.
But if it's true

You can see it with your eyes,
Oh even in the dark,
And that's where I want to be, yeah

Go get your shovel!
We'll dig a deep hole!
To bury the castle, bury the castle!
Well go get your shovel!
and we'll dig a deep hole!

To bury the castle, bury the castle.


~*~ End of lyrics time! ~*~

.
..
...
So.. My life, right?


[Edit]
Re-reading this made me cry. My life sucks...

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:iconhannahdoodle100:
yay Brick by boring Brick, i love that song :)

i love the story. its kinda like me and my imaganation... im stuck day-dreaming half time..
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:icondeer-princess:
My daydreams blend with my real life, so.. I dream most of the time~
Reply
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